21.

I remember the crabapple tree in our front yard. Was it a crabapple? That's something that I could have easily asked you before, now it's harder to confirm. I remember every year on the first day of school, you had us take a picture in front of the crabapple tree. Any major event, or day - picture in front of the crabapple tree. When I was younger I would climb on it. I remember when it flowered it had beautiful little flowers on it - is that right? I wish I could ask you. Then the tree was removed. I think because you re-did the landscaping in front? There was always a small mound, though, where that tree had once been.

And then I think of the cottonwoods in the backyard. They were so big! I loved looking up at them. It felt like there were giants in our own backyard. And then those trees would flower and there would be cotton everywhere. All over! Like it was snowing. There was so much cotton it would pile up on the edges of things and form little mounds. And then the wind would blow it away. I remember looking up at the sky and seeing little pieces of cotton floating around, mesmerized. I remember playing with those cotton pods as a kid. You loved those trees, too. Three giant cottonwood trees. Just like the three of us, you, me and Brad. I remember playing at the base of them. I remember looking up at them, so tall. I remember when we had to get those removed, too. They cut them up into pieces to break them down. Huge cranes carried the parts of the stumps right over our house! I remember standing outside with you and watching them do it. It was so wild! I remember you went to get a camera to take pictures of it because it was so spectacular. I remember being sad that those trees were being broken down.

New there's a redbud tree in front. We were able to re-do the front landscaping while you were sick - what a precious gift. I remember you were in between stays at the hospital when they were planting everything. You got to be at home and see it all come to life. When we were designing it, we would talk about that redbud tree and how beautiful it was going to be in spring. Something wonderful to look forward to. I remember when you were in hospice, you said to me, crying, "I'm not going to be able to see the redbud tree blossom". We were crying and I assured you that you would be able to see it, it would just be different. That tree and the landscaping made you so happy.

Now when I see trees I will think of you. I will think of their roots, their foundation, and how you gave me mine. I will think about how they pull their sustenance from the earth underneath, and gain energy from the air above. They withstand weather, they grow, and they evolve. You did all of those things. You did all of those things with such grace and flexibility. Just like a tree would.

I will look forward to the spring, when the redbud tree blossoms, and I know you'll be there with me, taking in its beauty.